The illusion of being different

A human being psychologically is the whole of mankind. He not only represents it but he is the whole of the human species. He is essentially the whole psyche of mankind. On this actuality various cultures have imposed the illusion that each human being is different. In this illusion mankind has been caught for centuries, and this illusion has become a reality. If one observes closely the whole psychological structure of oneself, one will find that as one suffers, so all mankind suffers in various degrees. If you are lonely, the whole humankind knows this loneliness. Agony, jealousy, envy, and fear are known to all. So psychologically, inwardly, one is like another human being. There may be differences physically, biologically. One is tall or short and so on, but basically one is the representative of all mankind. So psychologically you are the world; you are responsible for the whole of mankind, not for yourself as a separate human being, which is a psychological illusion… If one grasps the full significance of the fact that one is psychologically the world, then responsibility becomes overpowering love.

J. Krishnamurti/Letters to the Schools vol I, p 20

Ending conflict in all our relationships

So our first demand is whether it is possible to end conflict in all our relationships—at home, in the office, in every area of our life—to put an end to conflict. This does not mean that we retire in isolation, become a monk, or withdraw into some corner of our own imagination and fancy; it means living in this world to understand conflict. Because, as long as there is conflict of any kind, naturally our minds, hearts, brains, cannot function to their highest capacity. They can only function fully when there is no friction, when there is clarity. And there is clarity only when mind that is the totality—which is the physical organism, the brain cells, and the total thing which is called the mind—is in a state of non-conflict, when it functions without any friction; only then is it possible to have peace.

J. Krishnamurti/The Collected Works vol XVI, p 4

Not recording hurt or flattery

Is it possible not to record that hurt at the moment when I am called an idiot? Is it possible not to record at all, not only the hurt but flattery? Is it possible not to record either? The brain has been trained to record, for in that record there is safety, security, a sense of vitality; in that recording the mind creates the image about oneself. And that image will constantly get hurt. Is it possible to live without a single image about yourself, or about your husband, wife, children, firm, or about the politicians, the priests, or about the ideal—not a single shadow of an image? It is possible, and if it is not found you will always be getting hurt, always living in a pattern in which there is no freedom. When you give complete attention there is no recording. It is only when there is inattention that you record. That is: you flatter me; I like it; the liking at that moment is inattention, therefore recording takes place. But if when you flatter me I listen to it completely without any reaction, then there is no centre which records.
J. Krishnamurti/Questions and Answers, pp 54-55

It is the image that gets hurt

What is it that is hurt? One says that it is I who am hurt. What is that “I”? From childhood one has built up an image of oneself. One has many, many images, not only the images that people give one, but also the images that one has built oneself: as an American— that is an image—or as a Hindu, or as a specialist. So the “I” is the image that one has built about oneself, as a great or a very good man, and it is that image that gets hurt. One may have an image of oneself as a great speaker, writer, spiritual being, leader. These images are the core of oneself; when one says one is hurt, one means the images are hurt. If one has an image about oneself and another comes along and says, “Don’t be an idiot”, one gets hurt. The image which has been built about oneself as not being an idiot is “me”, and that gets hurt. One carries that image and that hurt for the rest of one’s life.

J. Krishnamurti/The Flame of Attention, p 88

Being hurt throughout life

Take for instance the hurt that each human being suffers from childhood. One is hurt by one’s parents, psychologically; then hurt in school, in university, through comparison, through competition, through saying one must be first-class at this subject, and so on. Throughout life there is this constant process of being hurt. One knows this, and that all human beings are hurt, deeply, of which they may not be conscious, and that from this all forms of neurotic actions arise. That is all part of one’s consciousness—part hidden and part open awareness that one is hurt. Now, is it possible not to be hurt at all? Because the consequences of being hurt are the building of a wall around oneself, withdrawing in one’s relationship with others in order not to be hurt more. In that there is fear and a gradual isolation. Now, we are asking: Is it possible not only to be free of past hurts but also never to be hurt again?

J.Krishnamurti/The Flame of Attention, pp 87-88

Images separate people

Why do we have images about ourselves? Those images separate people. If you have an image of yourself as Swiss or British or French and so on, that image not only distorts your observation of humanity, but it also separates you from others. And wherever there is separation, division, there must be conflict—as there is conflict going on all over the world, the Arab against the Israeli, the Muslim against the Hindu, one Christian church against another. National division and economic division all result from images, concepts, ideas, and the brain clings to these images. Why?

J. Krishnamurti/The Network of Thought, pp 40-41

Like two parallel lines

We are observing the actual relationship of man to man and woman, between two human beings, asking why there should be so much struggle, anxiety, pain. In the relationship of two human beings, be they married or not, do they ever meet, psychologically? They may meet physically, in bed, but inwardly, psychologically, are they not like two parallel lines, each pursuing his own life, his own ambition, his own fulfilment, his own expression? So, like two parallel lines, they never meet, and therefore there is the battle, the struggle, the pain of having no actual relationship. They say they are related, but that is not true, that is not honest, because each one has an image about himself. Added to that image each one has an image of the person he lives with. Actually we have two images or multiple images.

J. Krishnamurti/The Flame of Attention, p 71

Relationship is between two images

Why is that we human beings have not been able to solve this problem of relationship though we have lived on this earth for millions of years? Is it because each one has his own particular image put together by thought, and that our relationship is based on two images, the image that the man creates about her and the image the woman creates about him? So in this relationship we are as two images living together. That is a fact. If you observe yourself very closely, if one may point out, you have created an image about her and she has created a picture, a verbal structure, about you. So relationship is between these two images. These images have been put together by thought. And thought is not love.

J. Krishnamurti/The Network of Thought, p 87

The tremendous need for attachment

Our relationship is possessiveness, attachment, various forms of intrusion upon each other. What is attachment? Why do we have such tremendous need for attachment? What are the implications of attachment? Why is one attached? When you are attached to anything, there is always fear in it, fear of losing it. There is always a sense of insecurity. Please observe it for yourself. There is always a sense of separation. I am attached to my wife. I am attached to her because she gives me pleasure sexually, gives me pleasure as a companion; you know all this without my telling you. So I am attached to her, which means I am jealous, frightened. Where there is jealousy, there is hatred. And is attachment love? That is one point to note in our relationships.

J. Krishnamurti/Mind Without Measure, pp 80-81

We are that which we possess

We are that which we possess. The man who possesses money is the money. The man who identifies himself with property is the property, or the house or the furniture. Similarly, with ideas or with people, and when there is possessiveness, there is no relationship. But most of us possess because we have nothing else if we do not possess. We are empty shells if we do not possess, if we do not fill our life with furniture, with music, with knowledge, with this or that. And that shell makes a lot of noise, and that noise we call living, and with that we are satisfied. And when there is a disruption, a breaking away of that, then there is sorrow because then you suddenly discover yourself as you are—an empty shell, without much meaning.
J. Krishnamurti/The Collected Works vol V, p 297

Our daily activity is centred around ourselves

Most of our daily activity is centred around ourselves; it is based on our particular point of view, on our particular experiences and idiosyncrasies. We think in terms of our family, of our job, of what we wish to achieve, and also in terms of our fears, hopes, and despairs. All this is obviously self-centred and it brings about a state of self-isolation, as we can see in our daily life. We have our own secret desires, our hidden pursuits and ambitions, and we are never deeply related to anyone, either to our wives, our husbands, or our children. This self-isolation is likewise the result of our running away from our daily boredom, from the frustrations and trivialities of our daily life. It is caused also by our escaping in various ways from the extraordinary sense of loneliness that comes over us when we suddenly feel unrelated to anything, when everything is in the distance and there is no communion, no relationship with anyone.

J. Krishnamurti/The Collected Works vol XIV, pp 219-220

I begin with simple things

Seeing the world, seeing humanity, the “me”, and the necessity of a total, radical revolution, how is it possible to bring it about? It can only be brought about when the observer no longer makes an effort to change, because he himself is part of what he tries to change. Therefore all action on the part of the observer ceases totally, and in this total inaction there is a quite different action. There is nothing mysterious or mystical about all this. It is a simple fact. I begin not at the extreme end of the problem, which is the cessation of the observer; I begin with simple things. Can I look at a flower by the wayside or in my room without all the thoughts arising, the thought that says, “It is a rose; I like the smell of it, the perfume,” and so on and so and on? Can I just observe without the observer? If you have not done this, do it, at the lowest, most simple level. It isn’t really the lowest level; if you know how to do that, you have done everything.

J. Krishnamurti/The Collected Works vol XVI, p 205

When you start very near…

We generally start with the farthest—the supreme principle, the greatest ideal, and get lost in some hazy dream of imaginative thought. But when you start very near, with the nearest, which is you, then the whole world is open, for you are the world, and the world beyond you is only nature. Nature is not imaginary: it is actual; and what is happening to you now is actual. From the actual you must begin—with what is happening now—and the now is timeless.

J. Krishnamurti/Letters to the Schools vol I, p 58

Not self-improvement

The man who wants to improve himself can never be aware, because improvement implies condemnation and the achievement of a result. Whereas in awareness, there is observation without condemnation, without denial or acceptance.
That awareness begins with outward things, being aware, being in contact with objects, with nature. First, there is awareness of things about one, being sensitive to objects, to nature, then to people, which means relationship; then there is awareness of idea. This awareness, being sensitive to things, to nature, to people, to ideas is not made up of separate processes, but is one unitary process. It is a constant observation of everything, of every thought and feeling and action as they arise within oneself.

J. Krishnamurti/The First and Last Freedom, p 173

Awareness of outward things

If you are aware of outward things—the curve of a road, the shape of a tree, the colour of another’s dress, the outline of the mountains against a blue sky, the delicacy of a flower, the pain on the face of a passerby, the ignorance, the envy, the jealousy of others, the beauty of the earth—then, seeing all these outward things without condemnation, without choice, you can ride on the tide of inner awareness. Then you will become aware of your own reactions, of your own pettiness, of your own jealousies. From the outward awareness, you come to the inward; but if you are not aware of the outer, you cannot possibly come to the inner…When there is inward awareness of every activity of your mind and your body; when you are aware of your thoughts, of your feelings, both secret and open, conscious and unconscious, then out of this awareness there comes a clarity that is not induced, not put together by the mind.

J. Krishnamurti/The Collected Works vol XV p 243

Self-knowledge

Self-knowledge is the beginning of wisdom. In self-knowledge is the whole universe; it embraces all the struggles of humanity.

J. Krishnamurti/This Matter of Culture p 113

To go far you must begin very near

Surely, to go far, you must begin very near, but to begin near is very difficult for most of us because we want to escape from “what is”, from the fact of what we are. Without understanding ourselves, we cannot go far, and we are in constant relationship; there is no existence at all without relationship. So relationship is the immediate, and to go beyond the immediate, there must be the understanding of relationship. But we would much rather examine that which is very far away, that which we call God or truth, than bring about a fundamental revolution in our relationship, and this escape to God or to truth is utterly fictitious, unreal. Relationship is the only thing we have, and without understanding that relationship we can never find out what reality is or God is. So, to bring about a complete change in the social structure, in society, the individual must cleanse his relationship, and the cleansing of relationship is the beginning of his own transformation.

J. Krishnamurti/The Collected Works vol VI pp 137

Watching yourself

After all, to know yourself is to watch your behaviour, your words, what you do in your everyday relationships, that is all. Begin with that and you will see how extraordinarily difficult it is to be aware, just to watch the manner of your behaviour, the words you use to your servant, to your boss, the attitude you have with regard to people, to ideas and to things. Just watch your thoughts, your motives in the mirror of relationship, and you will see that the moment you watch you want to correct; you say, “This is good, this is bad, I must do this and not that.” When you see yourself in the mirror of relationship, your approach is one of condemnation or justification; therefore you distort what you see. Whereas, if you simply observe in that mirror your attitude with regard to people, to ideas and to things, if you just see the fact without judgement, without condemnation or acceptance, then you will find that that very perception has its own action. That is the beginning of self-knowledge.

J. Krishnamurti/The Collected Works vol VI p 307

Self-knowledge through relationship

Self-knowledge is not according to any formula. You may go to a psychologist or a psychoanalyst to find out about yourself, but that is not self-knowledge. Self-knowledge comes into being when we are aware of ourselves in relationship, which shows what we are from moment to moment. Relationship is a mirror in which to see ourselves as we actually are. But most of us are incapable of looking at ourselves as we are in relationship, because we immediately begin to condemn or justify what we see. We judge, we evaluate, we compare, we deny or accept, but we never observe actually ‘what is’, and for most people this seems to be the most difficult thing to do; yet this alone is the beginning of self-knowledge.

J. Krishnamurti/The Collected Works vol IX p 137

Relationship is the mirror

To live is to be related. So I have got to understand it and I have got to change it. I have to find out how to bring about a radical change in my relationship, because, after all, that produces wars; that is what is happening in this country between the Pakistanis and the Hindus, between the Muslim and the Hindu, between the Arab and the Jew. So there is no way out through the temple, through the mosque, through Christian churches, through discussing Vedanta, this and that and the other different systems. There is no way out unless you, as a human being, radically change your relationship.
Now the problem arises: How am I to change, not abstractly, the relationship that is now based on self-centred pursuits and pleasures?
J. Krishnamurti/The Collected Works vol XVI pp 34-35